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I REALLY CANT KEEP UP

November 19th, 2012 by Michael Tabor

Written by guest blogger Le Duke de fromage

I recently sent a letter of complaint to Comcast, my Internet provider protesting the constant blurbs relating to non-news items about Kim Kardashian.They refused to accept it because I called her a porno queen, when I changed it to sleaze queen they happily published it. What was their logic in that? Their answer to my complaint was if I didn’t like it , change my web page. I felt this was an arrogant response so I wrote to Comcast corporate office. I accused them of accepting money to run phony news stories concerning Kim.They didn’t bother to answer my inquiry; however, I did get an ad for their On Demand service, which I threw away with great disdain.I figured they must be busy buying N.B.C. so I switched to Yahoo. Sadly, it wasn’t much better.


Well its time to admit it I cannot keep up with the Kardashians. They have beaten me; in spite of my rather feeble efforts, I am ready to accept defeat. Yes, Kim, and her two rather sad sisters Klump and Klepto, the evil mother, and the pathetic, wimp-ass step-father has won.Speaking of which, what happened to this guy? Bruce Jenner won an Olympic medal for the decathlon, a very physical demanding sport. He even had his picture on a Wheaties box ,a very high honor? But why the plastic surgery? He looks like an effeminate waiter at a California sushi bar.Evidently he had a bet with Kim over who would look better after body altering surgery.Kim went to the finest Hollywood surgeon money could buy and allegedly has had nose job. breast implants, face botox, and butt implants and she was not even 30 years old. Bruce went to a kiosk at Walmart and opted for day surgery. The results are obvious. During the operation he also completely lost his manhood, how else to appear on national T.V. as a complete boob.
Typical Episode example— Bruce, reclining in lounge chair on patio wearing designer sweat suit {label prominently displayed} showing athletic look, Kim enters picture wearing revealing bikini,{sexual desire look} cameras linger on shot of Kim’s implanted bust while bending over.Kim glances at Bruce, asks inane question, Bruce, with glazed, distant look unsure of response, pauses, and mumbles inaudible answer. Kim gives admiring stare, thanks Bruce for advice, tells him what a wise and wonderful stepfather he is and exits while camera lingers on jiggling in-planted buttocks. This is definitely reality T.V. at its best. And what drama, why you could cut the tension with a machete.Would you believe Kim has never had an acting lesson in her life?
Somewhere in America, there is a secret enclave where people gather in darkness and guilty watch taped shows of the K’s while greedily devouring snack foods. I personally think it’s in New Hampshire. It has to be because no-one will admit to actually watching openly. Yet, “E” the network for people who have absolutely no life pays big bucks for the “K.s” to really act out their lives. Their show comprises about a third of “E,s” prime time output. They repeat it several times a day and night, in case you didn’t understand the plot the first 3 times.The show is as real as a completely phony setting with microphones,cameras, and a crew of about 8 people watching every move.This show is as real as Kim’s bust and Jenner’s face. It is staged, scripted, cut, edited, and woodenly acted by some very untalented people.Kim’s claim to fame is a “leaked”, sex tape which was so staged I swear “E” filmed and produced it. The fact that she was paid several million dollars for a leaked tape {which was meant for their own use and she was very very angry at her then current boyfriend wink, wink, nod, nod reveals volumes about how they operate}
Kim has followed this up with almost daily appearances on-line of exposing her body in various stages of semi-nudity under the guise of important “celebrity” news. Sadly, because she has no talent whatsoever this is all she has to offer. Her latest affair with minor celebs and her totally faked marriage are supposed to keep the public enthralled and breathlessly waiting for her next p.r. release. It shows how gullible and dumb some of her fans are.Of course no-0ne admits to watching so its actually hard to find a fan.
Obviously the woman displays classic narcissistic personality traits, but the whole family.They should create a new show the “K,s” go to therapy but Kim and Jenner would probably show up in bikinis.They would no doubt use Dr. Phil , another grabit while you can quack.
So on it goes, and I am a beaten man and can only guess what hi-jinks the “K,s” have in store for a hidden public. However I can make one promise I may be beaten but I ain’t gonna watch.

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2 Responses to “I REALLY CANT KEEP UP”

  1. magdalena tabor Says:

    Fear not, Le Duke. This too shall pass……………but only to be replaced by the next family of Bimbos. Unfortunately there’s no end to the steady stream of idiocy. And the idiots who watch them. I’m still trying to block out the Lohans.

  2. Michael Tabor Says:

    I truly was lol (laughing online) when I read this. This is so chock full of interesting and quirky things, I feel compelled to elaborate a bit. First of all, what is the deal with Comcast ? Porno queen/sleaze queen ?? Okay, technically she’s not an adult film star, she’s actually more despicable. I guess I’m hanging with the right crowd, because I have never heard anyone say anything remotely positive about Kim Kardashian or the show, etc despite the always soaring ratings. No I’ve never seen the show but I’ve heard way more than I want to know about it because as you said, every media outlet is throwing it in your face. Incidentally, I don’t find Kim K. to be attractive @ all – pretty face and lovely hair but that ass is so gargantuan and full of cellulite (or saline) that it must take her an hour to clean properly after she does a #2 (sorry for the vulgarity but I despise this spoiled brat).
    And finally Bruce Jenner – Bruce Jenner – what has become of you? He was always I guess a pretty boy, but we all let it slide because of his amazing athletic ability. BUT, I never thought that he embraced his less than manly appearance – what real man wants to look like a girl?? (BTW, effeminate waiter at a California sushi bar is hysterical) Again, I’ve never met anyone who has admitted to liking, let alone watching the dopey show, but obviously someone is – ratings don’t lie.

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